SOBS V HAMMERS

The Lads opened their Premier League campaign with a comprehensive defeat of the not so happy Hammers and their unnecessary away kit. Like the Mini Metro that knocked me off the bike all those years ago, I didn't see that one coming. A cleverly cautious first half, to find our feet, like, was followed by a second of almost complete control. Two delicious headers were capped off by the sort of finish only Isidor can pull off to put us top of the league. Alphabetically, but still top and begging for an early MOTD slot.

Adults behaving like bairns on Christmas Eve, carefully laying out their match day attire, reselecting said match day attire, repeatedly going through established match day routines, greeting their usual travelling companions with a nervous but excited "alreet, marra?" as if they'd not met since May, sharing thoughts, hopes, and dreams for the coming campaign, wearing the biggest and daftest smiles, having strangers shout "Ha'way the Lads" as you make your way to the bus, a pub full of expectancy, Monty the bus dog, winning the football card, adding noise and colour to that wedding at the City Hall, singing on the bridge...it must be Premier League day one for our beloved SAFC. The end of an eight year journey, the start of another of yet to be determined length, but one on which we'll be joyous passengers.

What with the almost daily arrival of quality signings (whoops, there's another one) two other signatures stood out - those of Trai "that tackle" Hume and Luke "Mr Sunderland" O'Nien, for another five and two years respectively. Marvellous news, unlike the Premier League "headlines" that we're now going to be subject to and part of... "Phil Foden can't park properly" and other such earth-shattering stuff.

Roefs

Hume Ballard Seelt Reinaldo

Talbi Xhaka(c) Diarra Sidiki Adingra

Mayenda

...and a bench of Patterson, Rigg, Le Fee, Guiu, Roberts, Alderete, Neil, Isidor, H. Jones.

West Ham kicked off on a sunny Sunlun afternoon in front of a packed house, towards the Roker End. Is it new club policy for us to attack that end in the second? Who knows, but only a couple of minutes in Roefs saved well low near his left post. The corner was punched away by Rooooooefs and the loose ball whacked way over. That'll do.

Five minutes later we broke down the inside right channel and it was the visiting keeper's turn to get in the way, but they cleared Hume's corner. It took ten minutes for the first foul, for a pull by Adingra. Seelt then went on a bit of a Benno-esque run through the middle, but the move broke down. A free to the visitors saw them take two minutes to set things away, but it was hit way too long.

It did eventually fall for West Ham, but Big Dan saved Roefs the trouble of making a save by flying in with a dramatic block that got the fans roaring. We were growing into the game, with Talbi's work rate impressing, and we broke from a Hammers corner and won a corner of our own on our left that brought cries for handball. No VAR. Boo. A couple more from our new dead-ball gadgies, Hume, had the visiting defence scrambling to clear.

Zero added minutes, a shot saved and a block apiece, numerous foul throws ignored, and no VAR. I'll take that.

No changes for the second half, and Hume started slotting balls inside their left back for us to chase. Mayenda caught one right on the line, but his cut-back was fired wide. Then Seelt went down on halfway, was treated but collapsed immediately on returning to the field - meaning we got our first sight of Alderete on 52, and that changed the game. Nothing wrong with Seelt's contributions, but Omar immediately showed his class. Another Hume corner was headed wide at the back post by Ballard, then more good work by Diarra made the space for a shot that went a yard over. Nearly, nearly, just before the hour...

Then it happened. A cross from deep on the left by Omar was headed back by Mayenda and seemed to take forever to nestle in the side of the net. Girrruppp! The 62nd celebrations melded into the round of applause in memory of match day steward Donna Weir, who passed away recently, bringing memories of others who saw us promoted but didn't get to see us back in the Prem - Ronnie Turnbull off the Durham bus, and Colin Dunn, despite many years in the Midlands still a vociferous fan whose last birthday was May 24th. RIP marras, a fitting tribute.

That was us up and running. We'd sussed the opposition and we ran at their weak spots. We worked our socks off, and our pace down the wings had them on the turn constantly. After another corner, in came a cross from the right and there was Big Dan to head in the second. Wowsers!

There was only one winner after that, and despite threatening down their right, not much came in from there and we had Talbi's afterburners to admire. Adingra and Mayenda made way for Le Fee and Isidor, and our fresh legs had the visitors chasing shadows. Talbi slotted it through for Isidor, and he finished as only he can, down the left and slotting it past the keeper with his right. Hahahaha!

On came Rigg for Talbi for the remainder of the seven added minutes, then the celebrations began. Lovely stuff, befitting our new Lambton Worm flag, and sending us home deliriously happy.

Man of the Match? Wow. Hume showed he's better than good enough, the new boys showed they are better than good enough, but for the block and the goal, it's Big Dan for me. Another who's showed himself better than good enough.