Never mind the Euros, Sunderland signed Geads! I suppose he only left for a few hours on a contractual technicality, but I’m glad to have him back. Now we just need Luke and Denver to make their minds up, and we can add them to the list of contracts tied up. We’ve brought in a load of young’uns “for the under 23s” but in our situation they’ll have squad numbers and will probably be playing sooner rather than later. Welcome to Wearside, goalie Jacob Carney (20, from Man Utd), defenders Cameron Jessup (19, from Palace), Ethan Kachosa (18, from Leeds), and Nathan Newall (19, from Guisely), and midfielders Harrison Sohna (19 from Villa), Thomas Scott (18, from Northampton), and Tyrese Dyce (20, from West Brom). Nee forwards, but no doubt that’ll be Dyce, as he’s simply described as “left sided” – but they don’t fool me.
Over in Euroland, or more specifically, the Gnomes of Zurich took on the Matadors of Madrid in St Petersburg (they don’t fool me, that’s Leningrad) and the Swiss shot themselves in the foot with yet another OG, this one flying in off Zakaria when Alba shot for goal. Only eight minutes in, the Swiss had a veritable Alp to climb and almost got there, holding the Spaniards at bay for the rest of the half and applying pressure of their own. Shaqiri pounced on a bit of sloppiness in the opponents’ defence to equalise with a little over twenty minutes to go, but any hope they had of storming ahead was snuffed out when Freuler was sent off with twelve or so to go. They showed great resilience to prevent any addition to the scoreline and must have been thinking of their heroics in the shoot-out against France – but got this one all wrong. After denying the Spaniards any success with all but one of their 28 shots and 13 corners, they must have felt confident of repeating their success from the spot, and when Busquets whacked the first effort off the post, it was looking like Toblerones all round.
Gavranovic shot his kick high into the corner, then Olmo did likewise, before Schar’s effort was saved. Never trust a mag. Never mind, Rodri’s was also saved – as was Akanji’s. This was getting silly – memories of Old Trafford in 2014 for me. Moreno then scored, before Vargas buggered things up for the Swiss by blazing it over the bar, Phil Jones style.
3-1 to Spain on pens, setting them up for a trip to Wembley to play the winner of the evening’s second game in Munich. Belgium and Italy slugged it out, with the Italians maintaining their fast flowing game and the Belgians as usual having De Bruyne spray those trademark passes all awwa the shop. First blood almost went to the Azzurri when Bonuci scored from close range – but Mr VAR called offside. Barella then did a Geads, leaving three defenders baffled before firing home on the half hour, and doubled their advantage just before the break through Insigne. He ran from the left side of halfway, then cut inside and curled in a beaut – think Allan Johnston against Bolton, but with the keeper making a better effort at saving it than Flappyhands Jaaskaleinen. Even at two goals down, there was something about the Belgians that made you think they weren’t yet dead, and well into added time, a crazy challenge from di Lorenzo took out Doku near the goal line in the corner of the box, and Lukaku stuttered up to the spot to score. Somehow they didn’t get a second, with Lukaku so unlucky on several occasions, a shot hitting a defender’s leg and a cross to the back post being touched just over his head a yard out when the scoreboard operator was already typing in “2-2”. Belgium continued to have the bulk of the chances, but neither side could get either the clincher or the leveller, and Italy now face the Spanish. Canny game, that – which I reckon the Italians will make their fourteenth consecutive win.
Anyway, with Freaky Friday out of the way, it was Serious Saturday. We’d had our two tables booked at the Hoss well in advance, and our orders for half-time toasties in place. We’d had the offer of an extra night’s holiday, at no extra cost, which would have been a great birthday present for my better half, but the offer didn’t arrive until half ten this morning, and I’d made other arrangements...
Would Southgate add a bit more creativity to midfield at the expense of solidity? You can’t really play Grealish, Sterling, and Saka behind Kane – or can you? You can’t really drop Saka after the Germany game, and Sterling just keeps scoring. Perhaps he’d put Mount in instead of either Rice or Phillips. Whatever he was doing, there was a more important game at the Brewery Field, Spennymoor, where our first pre-season jaunt took place. I had a previous engagement of the type only cancelled by a competitive match, so I had to turn down the offers of a ticket on Friday and Sunday – no names to protect the innocent. What was initially billed as a three half hour job (aye, right) eventually reverted to the standard two 45 minute halves with the first team out first and the U23s in the second half. O’Brien put us ahead in the first period before nipping off to the nearby Moors Tavern and Little Tap with the rest of the first team, and the kids took over for the second half. When the equaliser came, my spy reckoned it was going to be an awkward afternoon, which got even awkwarder when Spenny got a second. However, the impressive Ellis Taylor dragged us back into in front of 1012 happy football fans. Another spy told me that O’Nien wants to stay and that it’s just a case of tying up loose ends. Happy days. Burge, Gooch, Diamond, Winchester, Wright, Flanagan, Neil, Embleton, Grigg, Stewart, O’Brien....and for the second half, Hawkes, Taylor, Wilding, Patterson, Kachosa, Almond, Jessup, Dyce, Wearne, Sohna, Harris, Dunne, Newall, Scott.
Over in Rome, Southgate did indeed tinker with the personnel and formation, going for a flat back four – Pickers
Walker Stones Maguire Shaw
Phillips Rice
Sterling Mount Sancho Kane
We’d hardly had time to watch the next table hoy back their second round of shots when Sterling turned back on the left and cleverly released Kane with what they call a reverse pass. Harry (I can call him that now he’s scored) simply stuck a foot out and poked it past the keeper, who in all honesty should have spread his arms and he’d have stopped it – but we can’t all be Jordan Pickford, can we? 87 minutes to hang on, we thought, as the team simply passed it across and back and generally kept possession. I was a little disappointed in Sancho, who hardly saw the ball before the break, and we did let (the) Ukraine get in a shot that Pickers scooped away for a corner. Half time and the toasties arrived with the general feeling that it was going to be another case of being better than the opposition and controlling the game without really sparkling – then the half started, a cross from the impressive Shaw came in, I said “Maguire” and he duly rose like a rather large salmon to thump in a header. There was a totally unnecessary VAR check to see if the hair on his elbow was closer to the goal than a defender’s hip, but it was 2-0 and basically that was game over. Certain Ukranian players had looked sick of their lives before the break, and would probably have nipped off to the Moors Tavern or the Little Tap had there been a charter plane available. Pickers produced another fine save, although the purists will probably say he should have held it rather than punch it – but it didn’t go in, and it went to safety. Hendo got a good run out, presumably to do what he does and settle the team to ensure no daftness and the victory. Just a side note here, as Rob Gilchrist pointed out. A decade ago we lost rather badly to them up the road. A week later two players made their England debuts. One has gone on to win the European Cup (OK, Champions League), the Premier League title, and captained his country. The other is Andy Carroll. Just sayin’, like.
Two minutes after Maguire’s header, Kane produced one of his own, from another Shaw cross, to make it 3-0 and the singing went off the scale. Thirteen minutes after that, with glasses still being clung onto in the wake of Kane’s goal, Hendo – yes, Hendo – glanced in yet another header, this time from a Mount cross, for the England goal even his dad must have been thinking wasn’t going to come. 37minutes left, and England basically gave people (Rashford, Calvert-Lewin, Bellingham) a run out as the Ukranians prayed for it all to stop so they could jump in the Trevi Fountain with a few bottles of Peroni. While the possession was about evenly shared between the two sides, the effectiveness was all English. Pickers became the first keeper to claim five clean sheets in the Euros, England have (very obviously) yet to concede a goal in five games, and Luke Shaw looks like he’s at the top of his game. The squad looks like it’s up there with the best, and Denmark – I almost forgot, they beat the Czechs 2-1 after racing in to a two goal lead before the inevitable Schick goal. They’ll be scared to death of Kane now that he’s come to life, and that’s good news for Sterling and anyone else who cares to utilise the space created when the opposition doubles up on England’s number nine...and Mal the Mag needs seven goals in the remaining three games to win some dosh form the Hoss Euro prediction thingy.
Wembley on Wednesday, anyone…
