A POEM BY HEW JAMESON
CAN WE BLAME MARTIN BAIN?
He brought optimism, hope, and quite the CV,
As he seemed to do alright at Rangers and Maccabi,
He took a leap of faith and swapped Tel Aviv for Seaburn,
Strode into the rotten core and replaced Maggy Byrne.
Can we blame Martin Bain?
David Moyes arrived with the promise of fresh legs,
He brought experience as well as eyes that looked like fried eggs,
In came, Djilobodji, N’Dong, and McNair,
Signings that didn’t exactly thrill if we’re going to be fair.
Can we blame Martin Bain?
As the season went on, we got shite-er and shite-er,
Along came January and we were in need of a fighter,
Instead we bought injury prone Gibson and semi-retired Lescott,
We were resigned to relegation and there were whispers of a boycott.
Can we blame Martin Bain?
Moyes walked away and in-came Simon Grayson,
He was under no illusions of what he was facing,
The big names left but their wages stayed,
With Papy and Wahbi’s mortgages still being paid.
Can we blame Martin Bain?
After a promising start, once again we slid down the table,
The personable Grayson huffed and puffed but he just wasn’t able,
When we needed a win, we drew 3-3 at home to the bottom club,
15 minutes after the final whistle Grayson was sacked and in the pub.
Can we blame Martin Bain?
Bain brings in Chris Coleman off the back of Wales’ success,
Surely, he can be the man to get us out of this mess,
In January let’s bring in some players so he can get us ganin’,
We loan Boro’s fourth choice striker and let go of top scorer Lewis Grabban.
Can we blame Martin Bain?
Can we blame Martin Bain? I think not to do so would be wrong,
A load of long-serving staff axed, eight million for Djilobodji and thirteen for N’Dong,
Ellis Short takes most of the abuse and rightly so,
But to let Bain off scot-free, I don’t think that’s right, you know.
Can we blame Martin Bain?
Yes.
