Well, after the late, late shenanigans against Arsenal, which make you feel just about as good as you can feel as a football supporter, we were ready for the game at Anfield, as Liverpool, for all their getting within a goal of Man Utd, hand looked as dodgy at the back as a two-wheeled Transit.

Then came Tuesday, when we performed so far below par that Tiger Woods was onto our case, and we feared the worst, as Sunderland fans are wont to do, until Wednesday evening arrived. Northampton, managed by former Sunderland player Ian Sampson, did the business in the pelanty (copyright C. Waddle) shootout. OK, so Ian only managed one goal to counter the two OGs he managed for the Lads, but that one was a winner down at Southend back in 92, so despite only seventeen games for us I still find it interesting to see what he’s up to. Maybe his Wednesday win would rile Liverpool into action, but we hoped it wouldn’t.

By Friday night I had three spare tickets in my hand so folks, when you think about going to a game, make sure you really plan to go – it’s not difficult. Just decide you want to go, adjust your plans accordingly, buy your ticket go. Gripe over, let’s get on with the game, which could and probably should seen us come back from Anfield with a famous victory – but the ref had other ideas. He either had no idea of the basic rules of the game, or, if he did, had no idea how to apply them.

After a sunny few hours on the trans-Pennine bus, during which our topic of the day was the many and varied types of faeces to be found in Britain’s wild places, we got shot of one ticket at the services, then arrived near the ground in time to jump in a taxi and fetch up at the Globe, it of the famous slopey floor. It proudly displayed a photograph of Kitty the barmaid gaining her BA(hons) in Customer Service, and was populated with the usual Liverpool array of characters, most of whom had been in at least one band in the sixties or had a bit part in an Alan Bleasdale play. One lad wouldn’t believe me when I told him I wouldn’t have Carragher in our side, as he’d never get away with what he gets away with at any club but Liverpool. Burnsy the Mag joined us for a drink and presented us with a bag of black and white mints “for good luck” before we taxied back to Anfield and tried to get rid of the remaining tickets. The closest I got was a drunk Cockney wearing a Sunderland/Liverpool scarf who claimed he’d already had his ticket taken off him - presumably for being ratarsed – and then got all stroppy when I offered to sell him a replacement rather than give him it for free, claiming he was a Seaburn casual and was ready to take on anybody one-to-one.

Ming
Onouah Bramble Turner Bardsley
Almo Hendo Catts Steed Wellbeck
Bent

One up front again, and to be honest we played it well, with Cattermole being a powerful but sensible anchor in the heart of midfield and Steed holding the ball well and distributing effectively, with Hendo’s younger legs covering a lot of ground. Wellbeck was holding wide on the left but breaking forward to help Bent as often as possible, while the defence, despite yet another permutation, looked composed. It all counted for nothing after a few minutes, just after Gerrard had rightly been ruled offside before putting the ball in, when the ref asked to retake a free-kick, Turner appeared to roll the ball back to where should have been taken, they nicked it and broke two on one and Kuyt scored. Big Billy Bollocks, all that early promise wasted, but we were back into them straight away and Turner volleyed over the top and Bent got onto Carragher’s weak back pass but Reina cleared with his feet. Ming’s first real action was a comfy save on 20 minutes, and five minutes later Almo’s cross from the edge of the box has cleared by Poulsen’s right arm – easy decision for the ref. Benty did the right thing against a keeper with a bit of form against penalties, and hit it hard and low. 1-1, and the least we deserved. We followed this with several passages of crisp first-time passing to make a mockery of Liverpool’s alleged pedigree. They managed to hold play up because their injured number three kept one arm on the field when the ref could and should have made him get completely off, and it gave them time to get a sub ready and on before we could take the corner. Benty wasted another breakaway on 35, and Elmo knocked Hendo’s cross over, then fired well wide as we ended the half well on top. 1-1 was the very least we deserved, as our defence looked solid around Bramble (he’ll never crumble) while theirs looked very get-attable.

After many millions of gallons of water were sprayed onto the field, mostly in our right back position, we were off again. No changes for the second half, and Torres, with Bramble giving Torres no time or space, looked like he’d happily hop on the next Easy jet flight from John Lennon airport to anywhere in Spain. There were several balls he’d have bust a gut to chase last season that he just looked at despairingly today. Five minutes in, Hendo did cracking work to find Onouah on the right, who put in a perfect cross to the back post to be met by a flying Darren Bent, and the header flew in for 2-1. Bedlam on the terraces (well, nobody was sitting down, so that’s what they were, terraces with seats). We were well on top, and even Catts got in a shot from distance that was wide by a couple of yards before Benty nearly got in again. Torres and Kuyt were booked as the home players looked to be losing the plot, and they brought on Ngog for Lucas on the hour. This gave our midfield a bit more space as their replacement moved further forward, but on 63 our tackle out on their right broke for them, the cross was deflected straight onto Gerrard’s head and it was 2-2. Big Billy Bollocks again, it’s all payback for that bloody beachball. It got a bit tasty on the halfway line, and as one of their players lay injured, Carragher nipped of down the tunnel. Possibly to nick our hubcaps, probably for a dump. When he jogged back on a few minutes later, putting on what I can only assume was a new shirt, the ref told him to get off as he’d not given permission for him to come back on. So he went off, then came straight back on without being given permission to do so. Well done, ref.

Joe Cole, who’d been fairly pointless up to then, left his studs dangerously high, then Gerrard appeared to put in an elbow on Wellbeck which earned him a mild chat from Mr Atwell. On 75, Bardsley saved the day with a great block in the box. Mr Atwelll missed a frantic offside flag against Pool, then pulled us back thirty yards to give us a free when a break looked on. With ten to go, Wellbeck made way for Gyan as Brucey went for the win our dominance warranted. Fair play, Liverpool then produced their best football of the afternoon, mainly down their right. Bardsley earned his corn repelling most of their attacks, and with two left Riveros replaced Steed and six added minutes were announced. Ming took a knock saving well from a corner, Zended replaced Bent, and he got approximately ten seconds on the field before the whistle went, we applauded the players, they applauded us, and the home fans looked really disinterested about the planned post-match protest.

A point from Anfield is something we’d have settled for at three, but we were on top for most of the game and deserved all three. Bramble was tremendous again, Turner looked like he’d never been away, and Bardsley deserves high praise for his performance at left back. Onouah looks much more comfy at right back than in the centre, while Elmo just needs to sharpen up his crossing to become a very useful winger. Cattermole showed that he can play the midfield hardman without being the midfield idiot as he harried and chased to keep Steed supplied. Bent played the lone ranger to good effect, with good support from Hendo and Wellbeck – we just need to help him out with some goals from other areas of the pitch, as he might have a lean period some day, although it doesn’t look like it.

Man of the Match Steeeeed. Held the ball up, held the opposition off, pulled the strings aided by Cattermole. Great performance, and we’re not far from being a better than decent side – we just need to remove performances like Tuesday’s out of our repertoire. Today was much more like it, and a win would have been a fairer result – and that’s not me being biased.

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